Having a great Christian marriage is what most females dreamed of when we were a child, so, why are so many of us getting a divorce? Life is funny. Often women are in a hurry to get married and have children, only to have all of that and be unhappy. Men complain because their wives have become consumed with being a great home manager and have forgotten about being a women, the women that captured their heart. It is possible to remain a women and be a great home manager, but you must see the need for both. Understand that managing the home is great but if you stop managing your marriage your “home” will feel less like a home full of warmth and love and more like a house, a place to sleep at night. So let’s work on balancing the covenant of being a wife and the challenges of being the home manager. Here are a few tips that will help make your life a little more enjoyable.
1. Take time for yourself– Having personal time for yourself is NOT SELFISH, actually it is quite the opposite. Some people have a tendency to feel guilty about doing something for themselves, but when we make time for ourselves we will have better interaction with other people. It is essential that you find time for yourself, daily. Everyone needs time for themselves. When people do not have time for themselves two things happen, they either become very selfish and stop helping or giving to others entirely or feel unappreciated and are miserable and angry at everyone. You will notice a change in your attitude once you make time for yourself. This may mean that you have to get up earlier or go to bed after everyone else, but it is worth it.
2. Remember your priorities– God is supposed to be the head of our lives so we must spend time praying and reading the word, daily. Having devotional time with the Lord gives you strength and peace like you won’t believe. I have found that the more time I spend with the Lord the more peace I have in my life. When we pray to the Lord He replaces our natural eyes with spiritual eyes, the things that once bothered us no longer affect us anymore.
3. Think about others– It is easier to think about others after you have already taken care of your needs. However, there is joy is making others happy as well. Ask your spouse, what can I do to make your life easier today? If they do not give you something specific then use the knowledge that you already know about them. What do they complain about the most? Whatever they are unhappy with try to help them in that area. This will connect your hearts even more as your spouse begins to see the two of you as a team.
4. Be more open minded when making love– God create sex for married couples. Do not be so quick to say no to trying something new. Enjoy the freedom of the marriage bed and explore each other’s bodies. God designed sex in a way that it connects us to those we give our bodies too as stated in 1 Corinthian 6:16 “ 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” For this reason we must pray and ask God to remove any ties we may have with someone that is not our spouse. God can and will break the connection you have to past lovers if you pray about it. When we make love to our spouse we become closer in every other area, physically, mentally, spiritually.
I know that becoming a mother changes us in ways that we never thought it could by affecting the simplest things like our hair, clothes, energy, life but whatever we do let’s not relinquish being a women for home manager.
Challenge: What could you do more of or less of to give your life a little more balance? Here are a list of question to ask yourself to get your life back on track.
- Do you take too much time or not even time for yourself?
- Do you spend too much time or not even time with God?
- Do you think about others all the time or none of the time?
- Do you try new things in the bed or stick to the basics?
The key to having a more balance life is to make sure that you are not doing too much or too little of anything. Moderation is the key, “ 5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.” Philippians 4:5
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