What makes a good marriage? How do we know when we have a good
marriage? Is a good marriage easy to spot? Does the length of a marriage make it a “good” marriage? Most people enter marriage with the desire to live out the vows they recited on their special day. Shortly after the wedding, couples begin to realize that the vows are needed not for the lovey moments, but for the trying times. We soon find out more about ourselves then we could have ever discovered without marriage. I recently read a quote by Gary and Betsy Ricucci, it said, “One of the best wedding gifts God gave you was a full-length mirror called your spouse. Had there been a card attached it would have said, “Here’s to helping you discover what you’re really like!””
Marriage opens our eyes to things that we love about life and people, as well as the things we dislike about life and people. Our spouse knows us in a more intimate way. They know exactly what areas we need to grow in and what areas we excel in. This is partly why marriage can be so challenging. There is always someone, albeit unintentional, causing us to come face to face with our flaws. Most couples allow their differences to divide them. Each spouse will generally become bothered by all the things their spouse is doing wrong. However, the interesting thing about our differences is that they typically complement our spouse’s differences. The areas we are strong in, our spouse is typically weaker, and the areas we are weak in, our spouse is typically stronger in. Our spouse is like a missing puzzle piece of us, and when we combine our strengths and weaknesses, we are complete.
What if we decided to view our spouse’s annoyances as an opportunity to bring us together, as we utilize our strengths. I once heard a minister say, “If something bothers us, it is because we are supposed to do something about it.” God would not bother your spirit about an issue someone else needs to address. He can communicate with anyone and everyone. Could it be that the things that bother us about our spouse are things we could easily settle ourselves? For example, if he always leaves the toilet seat up, we could become frustrated and remind him every time. Or we could take two seconds and lower the toilet seat ourselves. If she does not wash clothes as often as you would like it done, you could complain, or you could put a load in yourself.
Marriage is the union of two people who were raised a different way. We can either become frustrated by our differences, or we can see them as a way we complement each other. So, what makes a good marriage? How do we know when we have a good marriage? Is a good marriage easy to spot? Does the length of a marriage make it a “good” marriage? There is a simple answer to all the question listed above. A good marriage is the union of two people who realize they are different, and because of those differences, they need each other to be complete. Marriage puts our flaws on display, but we are reminded in 1 Peter 4:8 that love covers a multitude of sins (flaws). We can decide to either cover our spouse’s flaws by utilizing our strengths, or we can point out their flaws every time.
Christian Marriage HQ Challenge: What if we started to view our spouse’s annoyances as a way, we complement each other. How do you complement your spouse?
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