Women Are Simple!

We often hear men advising younger men who are just starting out in their Christian marriage to get used to saying “Yes, dear.”  They believe that saying yes dear is what keeps the peace in the house.  Men are so clueless!  What makes women feel loved?   Every women is different but we were all created and cursed the same way, so there are some similarities between us.  Every women has a need for relationship, how that need for relationship is satisfied varies according to each women’s personality.  If you really want to understand your wife you must first go to the word of God and read how he created the women  and how he cursed the women.

“Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man.”  Genesis 2:22

“Your desire will be for your husband,” Genesis 3:16

What do we notice about the way the women was created and cursed?  Well, women were created to have a relationship with our spouse.  God’s sole purpose for creating the women was so man wouldn’t be alone.  So God bless us with the desire to become best friends with our spouse.  He also cursed us in our area of relationship.  So what does that say about women?  We were created with a need for relationship.  The key to having a peaceful home is having a relationship with your wife.  Although hearing the phrase “yes, dear”  is nice, it is not what sustains a relationship. 

Although making love is great this does not sustain a relationship either, speaking from a females point of view.  We are all aware that men usually have a higher sex drive than women.  The gap between how much men want to make love versus how much women want to make love widens once we begin to have children.  Having children can be exhausting because they are very needed.  Women are typically in charge of taking care of the kids needs.  Even if the kids are in daycare or in school, the women still take care of them.  Whenever the children are in need of something the mother is the one that takes care of everything.  I believe the reason some men do not understand how draining taking care of our children can be, is due to the fact that we, the mothers  do it so well and with minimum complaining.

I believe having children increases the women’s desire for more intimate relationship with her spouse.  Having children changes everything for the women:

~How her time is spent (If we get a moment, we typically need to  relax)

~How she operates( there is method to everything, especially grocery  shopping)

~Her body (enough said!)

So how can a husband meet his wife’s need for relationship? Both men and women typically complain about the things that bother us the most.  So listen to her.  What does she complain about when it comes to you?

Challenge:  Listen to your wife today. Try and look past the complaints that are coming out of her mouth and listen for what she is really saying to you.  For example, she may say ” We never sit down and eat as a family.”  This is what she is really saying ” I want us to eat as a family tonight.” Listen to her with open ears and if possible satisfy that need.